10 Rules for Parents - Wrestling Success

Success is determined when the wrestler gets out of the program what he needs. There are many reasons to wrestle, some wrestle to have a social experience, some wrestle to get in shape for another sport and some wrestler to win a state title. The following are some rules for a successful wrestling experience:

1. In most situations our sons know we love them. What we really need to make clear through our words and actions is that they understand we will love, respect and will not be disappointed in them regardless of the outcome of any match. We may be disappointed in the results, but never the person. This will allow him to do his best without fear of failure. Be the person in his life he can look to for constant positive reinforcement.

2. Strive to be honest about your child's athletic capability, his competitive attitude and his actual skill level. This goes both ways, he may be better than what we think.

3. Be interested and supportive but don't coach your son. It's tough not to, but it's a lot tougher for the child to be inundated with advice, pep talks, and frequent critical instruction. Encourage your son to talk to the coaches, they want to help.

4. Teach him to enjoy the thrill of competition. It’s not all about winning it’s about getting better each day. Let him know that improving skills and attitudes are important. Help him to develop the feel for competing, working hard and having fun.

5. Leave your ego at home. Try not to re-live your athletic life through your child. This creates added pressure that your son does not need. Remember, we have all fumbled, lost games, been frightened.

6. Don't compare the skill, courage, or attitudes of your child with others members of the team within his presence.

7. Remember young men tend to exaggerate when being praised and criticized. Temper your reaction until you investigate.

8. Don't compete with the coach. Keep in mind that they are balancing the development of your child with the growth and development of an entire athletic program and team. Often coaches have many considerations that are not obvious to parents. Feel free to talk to the coaches.

9. Get to know the coach. Understand his philosophy, attitudes, ethics and knowledge in such a way that you are happy to have your child under his leadership.

10. Make a point of understanding courage, and the fact that it is relative. Some people can climb mountains but are afraid to fight. Others will fight but turn to jelly if a bee approaches. Everyone is frightened of certain things. Explain to your son, that courage is not the absence of fear, but means, finishing or doing something in spite of fear or discomfort.